Structure

I’m sitting here at a supervised visitation. These kids have done nothing but cause mass chaos in the two hours I have been here. The parents verbally get onto them but never follow through on a time out or remove the problem item or any other threats that are given. These children don’t say please or thank you. They don’t say yes or no ma’am. They scream and point instead of using their words. They lash out irrationally. They hurt each other. They hurt themselves.

The parents are half mentally checked out. They have no structure to behave themselves; how do I expect them to parent little thems?

The parents themselves grew up in chaos. They don’t know what anything but dysfunction looks like. I don’t expect them to live like “normal”. I just want safe. I want stable. The children deserve safe and stable.

So how do we get from one extreme to just decent? These parents are exhausted from their life’s choices that brought me here. The children are consumed by crazy being the norm.

Get sober. Get stable. Survive. Then Thrive.

Find positive support. Find somewhere to plug in. Find a better you to be. No one else can do anything for you if you don’t want to do anything for yourself.

You’re not wrong. You’re missing out on LOVE.

Don’t be “one of those Christians” and bash folks who don’t have your beliefs. I love God. He’s my best friend, my mentor, my confidant, my keeper, my daddy. He isn’t yours? Cool. You’re missing out on an unconditional love but you’re still a human being with thoughts and feelings.

We, as this 2018 society, have this idea that if it’s not how we live, it must be wrong.  This isn’t so.  There are so many ways to skin a cat (why is this even a saying, gag).  In my daily life, I have Christian friends. I have friends that don’t believe in anything. I have friends that believe in themselves above everything else. Within all of those categories, everyone believes differently. You can even read the Bible and see differently than someone else.  I believe God knows what he is doing. I believe that God put me on this earth to be his hands and feet and that it isn’t my responsibility to make people believe in God. It’s my responsibility to show everyone love.  If someone I run into doesn’t believe in God, they may just believe in what MY love for God “looks like”.  They will see the goodness in what I (mostly) do.   So instead of bashing you for what isn’t even my business, I will just love ya. Deal?

Galatians 5:22-23

22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.

To have a friend, be a friend.

I sit back and think on life sometimes, well, I’m a female, so a lot of times. Who are we kidding? EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. MOMENT. HOUR. SECOND…..

Where was I?

This world is huge.  7.5 billion strong.  That’s a whole lot of folks.  That is a whole lot of chances to give out nice and to accept nice.  I wake up every morning and immediately become determined to be nice to people. Some days I have to beg my inner bad attitude to stay focused.  Some days I have to calm myself down because I will give everyone, everything and end up with nothing.

Life is about moderation. I’ve said it before. I’ll say it again. Nothing is no good. Too much is way too much. Something. Now that’s where it’s at.

I am surrounded by some of the most understanding, caring, people.  I have good family, friends and co workers.  I even have clients and people at places of business that I enjoy to see often.  I want, at the end of the day, for those people to be thankful they know me. I don’t want them to ever wish they had never met me.

I’m what they call an introverted extravert.  I thoroughly enjoy people. I thoroughly enjoy quiet though.  Conversation can sometimes cause me anxiety.  Sometimes just having someone near is enough (5 love languages-quality time).

“Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind.
“Pooh!” he whispered.
“Yes, Piglet?”
“Nothing,” said Piglet, taking Pooh’s paw. “I just wanted to be sure of you.”
A.A. Milne, The House at Pooh Corner