Surrogacy : scared but hopeful

I had an incident yesterday. Around 11 o clock I had to go to the bathroom. Blood dumped out. I’ve never had this happen.

I called baby mama. I called doctor. I called my OB.

My baby mama got there in record time. We sat, she cried, I held her. This is all such a whirlwind. We Googled and pondered and Googled some more.

The fertility clinic couldn’t see me until the following morning.

We decided to go to the Emergency Room.

We didn’t have to wait long. My grandfather came and sat with us. He’s a Saint if there ever was one.

We went to a private room. They decided due to symptoms they would put use a catheter and put an IV. We then had an ultrasound.

There was a gestational sack and a yolk but no pole or heartbeat. My hcg levels were high, 13991. The nurse came in and discharged us with more questions than we had answers.

We meet at baby mamas home this morning and ride together. We talk about all the things. Her teaching at the end of the school year problems, my eating habits, etc. We arrive to the fertility clinic and sign in. We are both a nervous wreck.

I get my blood drawn and we go to room #2. Our crnp comes in and vaginally scans me. She sees the sack, the pole, the yolk. She just can’t see a heartbeat.

She wants to believe she saw a flicker but she just can’t say. She wants us to come back Friday but due to it being only 2 days, she opts for Monday…..until we realize Monday is Memorial Day…. Tuesday it is…… That’s basically 202697 forevers.

This is all we know.

If I begin to bleed again, I will go back to the emergency room. If not, we will have definite answers Tuesday.

Always stay prayin’

SURROGACY : It’s positive

Hello everybody! It’s me Pattie.Guess what? I’m going to have a baby.

I am over the moon excited for Mommy and Daddy! I started taking pregnancy test after day 2 because clearly I’m crazy. I started to get discouraged and started realizing why everybody told me not to take pregnancy test.

Friday, day 5, I started to notice a faint pink line. Every day after the pink line got darker and darker.I went for a blood test this morning and I got the call this afternoon. The beta is positive ladies and gentlemen it worked!!! Words cannot describe what I feel. Overwhelmed with joy! For those of you that listen to Christian radio, I called the Wally Show and announced it on the show.

I did not use my real name because the mom and the dad have not announced the information yet. It felt good to be able to announce it and I cannot wait until I can be open about this this is such a beautiful experience I have no words to express what I feel.

Signed,

Real Life Baby mama

Surrogacy Journey :after implantation

It’s been 4 days. 4 long excruciating days. They talk about this. The 2 week wait. Nothing will prepare you for it though.

I’m not a worry wart normally, but so much is riding on this. So much happiness. I have found myself very distracted. I just want it to work.”they” say, don’t test. You’ll make yourself crazy.

Hi.I’m crazy.

So I’ve taken 3. Because I’m out of control. All say negative. It’s honestly too early to tell. I have a blood test Friday morning. I should wait until then. But I don’t.I have continued taking my estrogen and doing my estrogen shots.

I had a security detail at an Aaron Lewis concert last night and had to manage a shot in between. It didn’t end well.I’m not certain what happened but I can tell you it hurts.Anyway. 4 days since implantation and I’m a nervous wreck.

Y’all pray for me and bebe embryo.

It went down. Way down. Way south.

IMPLANTATION DAY!

We made it.

I woke up too early. I tried to work but was not successful. I got my children ready for school and out the door. I spent extra time getting ready. I tried to embrace the entire morning. I got myself a bologna biscuit with extra mustar. Ate some candy, stopped for coffee and chat time and was on my way to the clinic by 10.

On the ride in, emotions began to flow. I’m doing this. We are doing this.

How beautiful.

We thawed 2 embryos. One was struggling and the next did better.

The doctor asked me about putting two embryos to ensure success. I have two children and a very demanding job. I just can’t do two embryos. I had emmense guilt but I declined.

My father and baby mama were in the room with me.

I, like always, cracked jokes to ease the tension.

The process wasn’t intense at all. It was more emotional than anything. The doctor, whom I had never met until today, implanted the embryo. We were able to see a small puff of air to know where it had been implanted. Baby BB is officially implanted in my uterus. Let the praying begin.

Boom.

Baby mama showered me and my two children with gifts. She is so special.

We stood in the parking lot and held each other. She placed her hand on my tummy while I held her and she prayed.

We are all so blessed to experience this.

God’s will be done.

We all go our separate ways. I go to my house to enjoy an afternoon of bedrest. My mother comes by. My grandmother and grandfather come by. It feels good to share this experience with my family. My grandfather ended up leaving my mother, my grandmother and I to our “girl talk”. We chatted about many things. I embrace these moments.

My grandmother left and my children came home from school. They were extremely interested in this journey and my daughter asked where the baby was. My sister in law, brother and children came by briefly. They checked on me and took my daughter for a few hours.

My baby mama came over to do my daily progesterone shot and stayed a while to chat. We have bonded and I enjoy getting to know her in this manner. I pray for her and this baby to be united as a family.

She had to go home and grade papers. We hugged and she left.

My mother discussed in several moments how cluttered my house was. Mom’s are grand huh? She means well. We snuggled in the bed. We ate snacks. She cleaned my sink, made dinner and left.

What a beautiful day!

Surrogacy : Baby Eve

Well we made it. It’s the night before transfer. I have so many emotions. I’m excited. I’m nervous. I’m hopeful. I’m scared.

My son had a baseball game in town. I had to ask the concession stand for a bag of ice. Actually, I asked my daughter to ask because I got it like that. She brought me a glove full of ice. I tucked it into my suit and continued to watch the game until baby mama arrived. The glove busted so I walked to the car with a wet rear end.

The only way we could do the shot tonight is in the back seat of my car. Oh to be in the mind of those people walking by.

My daughter was big and bad and wanted to give me the shot. I told her no. She got upset. I said, how about you watch baby mama prepare it and then you decide. She’s 7.

Baby mama got the shot ready and my daughter decided not only thst she wants going to give me the shot but she couldn’t even watch.

This is it. This is the last shot before I carry the embryo. Tomorrow at 11am I will be two. Prayers appreciated. Thoughts and any other voodoo welcome also. Operation #bringbabyhome is real!