Real

The medication has been ordered. It will be shipped to my door.

Wow. Talk about service.

This just got real folks.

I think I’ve said that for every step of this process.

I can’t stand needles. I have never been able to manage it. From the time I was a little girl to the time last week my blood was drawn. But that is why I’m that much more excited to do this for this couple. Every needle that gets jabbed into my fatty muscle means one step closer for my couple to have their dream.

I accidentally Internet searched IVF because I had a question about night time shots.

BAD IDEA FOLKS!!

It overwhelmed me slightly. But at the end of the day God’s got me through this. I don’t need a man for support. I don’t need a huge support of friends. I have a family. I have my “baby mama”. I have the “knowing” this gift is about to be a reality.

I am so ready for this. The shots are only a small part of it. I will make it through the shots and I will be implanted. I will pray all day every day for the baby to grow in my womb.

God knows us even before the womb. So God already knows these babies.

How beautiful is that?

Tata for now! 💜

You’re putting that where?

3.14.19. 830am

I arrive at the doctor’s office early. I try so hard to be on time and early when possible, anywhere I go.

I’m starting the actual process of being a surrogate. We’ve talked, we’ve planned, we’ve discussed. Now it’s time for the real deal. Elbow grease and physical work. They draw my blood first. Not quite sure why. I’m not good at asking questions. I go back into the lobby and wait to be called. I have the worst outfit on for the event. A jumpsuit. The doctor calls me back.

There they are. The stirrups of shame. No one likes the stirrups. But we get hiked up anyway. She says, in my own words of course, use this piece of large papered blanket to cover up your down south lady spot. I said well, this is a one piece, I have court today. She said um I will get you a gown. She brings me a gown that is so unattractive and she laughs about the appearance. Like I’m going to get a hot date while I’m there. Anyway. She leaves me to undress and returns.

She assures me it won’t hurt. She just has to put this doodad in this area. Wwhhooaaaaa

I tell her it’s been a long time since I had sex so hopefully everything goes in well (in my mind I’m thinking, I hope she can get around the cobwebs.) She has a student with her so she’s explaining the process to her. I crack jokes. It’s what I do. We laugh about dating and the pool that’s available. It’s an epedimic.

Anyway.

She “scratches” my uterus, which I later find out is awfully uncomfortable for way longer than expected. She releases a syringe of water to make sure my lining is OK. She says everything looks great and of course I have to joke about putting “pristine uterus” on a dating profile. She’s excited. I’m excited. My couple is excited. I should have an embryo planted by May 1 if all goes well. She leaves the room and I put my clothes back on and leave.

Here we go!! It. Just. Got. Real. 😊

Bebe and Abbie

3.11.19. The babies have been picked out. The embryo surrogate gave two babes. 3bb and 3aa. Future mama has named them Bebe and Abbie. I love her cleverness.

I don’t fully know what this choice means. But I know when an egg and sperm are taken, they join in a dish. They do their thing and poof, an embryo. This occurred 8 times. They grade the embryos. The embryos are frozen.

….. They wait….

Bebe and Abbie are in separate straws. We will only implant one at a time. I pray there is a success the first time but if not, there will be another straw and another process to try again.

I will start my diagnostic testing this week.

Please pray for these embryos to be strong. Please pray for my uterus to be healthy and embrace this beautiful gift.

Thank you all for being part of this journey with me.

Signed sealed delivered

3.4.19. I signed the final contract. It’s official. I’m going to be a vessel of hope. I’m going to give the gift of a bigger family. I’m going to give a baby to a mom and dad who are unable to do it themselves. I’m overwhelmed. I’m scared. I just want to have the healthiest baby I can. I want to have a good pregnancy. I want to be able to give the baby over appropriately when the time comes.

The clinic is giving an estimated May date for pregnancy. I will go through some hormone shots and prepping my uterus will take a few weeks, also. I’m going to be a mom. Without the mom part.

I pray for this unborn child.

Surrogacy appointment #1

January 3, 2019.

Mama and daddy picked me up from work so we would have time to chat before the appointment. We’ve known each other for years but we have not had a lot of personal contact. I’ve watched the couple go through so much in their journey of parenthood but that is their story to tell.

This is mine.

We hit traffic on the way there from roadwork on the interstate. We ran into closed roads. We got tickled talking about confusing downtown traffic and one way streets. We found the fertility clinic. Finally!!

We spent a time filling out paperwork then we waited. The doctor was ready for us and we went back.

Mom and dad shared their story. Doctor dis used the process with them. They shared a question and answer time. I’m so proud of mom. She’s researched so much. She’s serious and we know it. Doctor looked to me and asked me if I was good? Did I have any questions?

I did not. I told him I’m along for the ride. I’m honored to be able to help this couple. I’m blessed to give the gift of life.

Let’s do this.

He will not see us again until a legal contract is completed. Ok. Fair enough doc. See you soon.

🤗🤰🏿

Surrogate beginnings

I have desired to be a surrogate for years. I felt the pull after my son was was born because parenthood is so beautiful. I felt it heavily when a close friend of mine lost her newborn child. She ended up being able to birth a child and didn’t need my womb. My best friend was struggling with getting pregnant for years and I offered the option to her but they ended up getting divorced.

Here I am. 32 years old. A church friend of mine has gone through such a long draining emotional process of foster/adoption, ending in a very painful removal of an infant shortly after receiving the child. She had made it known she and her husband had decided on surrogacy with a donor embryo. I jumped at the opportunity. I told her I wanted to pray for a time and ask God to press in my heart what to do. I felt completely accepting to the ability to gift them a child. I asked several close friends and family and decided on yes.

This is huge.

Please respond with replies of support, disagreeance, thoughts and please oh please, if you’ve been a surrogate, get with me!!!

Let the journey begin!