Category: Prison Life

Part of the problem with not updating for 3 years is having to go way back in the past just to explain my thoughts in the present. (Remind me when I decide to dip out for several years how painful this is so that I don’t do it again)

I left DHR right after Covid hit. I was already frustrated with the red tape I continuously struggled with trying to balance between helping families and keeping kids safe and wanting the best for everyone involved but realizing often that DHR doesn’t have enough resources and parents don’t have enough support and follow through to achieve what is best for the children.

I left DHR to dispatch for the troopers. I truly enjoyed my position there. This was the same time my husband was attempting to become a trooper. I had to quit due to the hours not working out for my family. He ended up leaving the troopers also to go back to the sheriff’s office.

I had a friend that worked in the office of an online school. The hours were perfect and I had thought the environment fit me. I soon realized that I was made a bit rougher around the edges than what would fit into a modernized office environment. I was hired for a seasonal position and was not asked to return. The supervisor and I had a few words before I turned my notice in. I was at one of my lowest points in my life personally and the derogatory way I was treated was my last straw. I have gone to God about my feelings. I am big on making amends but I have just not felt it time to have that conversation with that person. I continue to seek guidance from Him awaiting discernment.

I happened upon a weekend job working at a teen facility that one of my school buddies worked at. It seemed like the perfect fit. Approximately 30 kiddos with traumatic stories to tell acting out from their pain which led them to be sent off to this camp. I know there’s a lot of negativity spoken about such camps but I truly loved my job and treated all of the kids wit respect while being stern with them. I was there for the last 3 years. It warmed my heart. It was 200 acres of farm, middle of the woods, life. It was basically a dream come true. It was the most physical job I have ever had and it tore my body up but I loved it and I loved each of the kiddos that came through that place in their own way. I got to see kids who hated everyone, hated themselves. I got to see them grow and gain confidence. I got to see them face their demons and stand up to their parent’s ( a lot of the issues the kids had stemmed from lack of parenting ability) in healthy ways having their feelings heard. It was tough. Ask any staff who truly believed in the place. It was emotionally draining often. I would have to contain the children when they would try to hurt themselves or others and I would jokingly tell them “If you wanted a hug, you could have just asked”. But they always knew I truly meant that and I feel like it showed in the connections I had with them. I was safe for them. I was unjudging. I was mean though. 😉 They’ll tell ya ha. Mrs. P. They decided to call me. They knew I meant business but would walk through fire for them. The place shut down OUT OF NOWHERE in February. One day I had a job, I was working the recovery group for campus, the next day they called me and let me go. The insurance for the year came out and it was unbelievably higher than the year before and they just couldn’t financially choose it for another year. So my dream was over . Just like that. We had to sign a waiver that stated we were to have zero contact with anyone from the camp. As soon as I was let go I reached out to those I had had the last 3 years. It was so nice catching up with them. Some of them are adults living their lives. Some of them are still stuck in stinkin’ thinkin’. But I cherish being able to check up on them through SM.

So it’s February. I have just had 2 shoulder surgeries from the life at the the facility. I was without a job.

I turned in my application for substituting within my kids school system in 2023. I began substituting and have continued to do this part time. I enjoy being a part of my kid’s school careers. It helps me to understand what the kids are going through and it helps me stay in their business. Some of them weren’t sure about it at first but now all 3 kids love when I sub. It doesn’t pay the bills but it’s the right thing for my family and their futures.

A friend of mine that I trained at DHR knew I was in hot pursuit of a new job due to my loss. She told me about this position where she worked at the local prison. It would be in the healthcare unit monitoring mental health inmates. I applied and a few weeks later I got the job. It’s an absolute Godsend. It’s part time but just enough to pay the bills I am responsible for. I work 2nd’s most days but if I’m here long enough I’m hoping to slip into days. I work mostly weekends so that I can be there for the kids during the week.

Through all of these job changes I see God. I see him lifting me up through the turmoil. I see him guiding me to the next position. I see him humbling me at every turn keeping my head level, gently showing me how I could have done things better. And I remember I am working for him not my employers (Colossians 3:23). At every single job I am able to speak into lives that desperately need to be spoken into. I allow God to guide me and give me the green light when it’s appropriate to speak about Jesus and I just show a mutual respect in other times that shines Jesus’ light without them knowing it’s his light that is shining. He shows me blessings through all of it. I am truly blessed in my employment.